Warning: Do Not Trust Africans, They're Dangerous
Posted: Tuesday, February 10, 2009
by Yangki Christine Akiteng
The Real People's Love Doctor
You can't trust an African. Why? Because he has a psychiatric condition that makes him think he can hear God speaking. He is schizophrenic and has conversations with dead people, spirits, trees, mountains, rivers, and wild animals. He is delusional and hears voices in the sky, in the wind and everywhere. He is paranoid and sees things everyone else cannot see -- only he can see. He is intellectually short-changed and feels things he cannot logically explain, and cannot be scientifically tested or proven. Something is definitely not normal about him. He is dangerous. You cannot trust him.
A normal person does not feel, he thinks and reasons. He does not enjoy life, he endures it. He gets up in the morning, and spends the day thinking and planning for a happy tomorrow. He spends hours and hours preparing for a happy retirement, and saving for a gold-plated coffin in an expensive funeral home. The clapping, singing and dancing will have to wait for the happy life after death -- in heaven. Those are a normal person's thoughts and actions.
A normal person is not a no body, he is somebody. He goes to the gym to look good. He wears expensive clothes to feel good. He eats in expensive restaurants to make a statement. He is somebody. Somebody outside of his own house. If only his wife would stop nagging him about not being rich enough. Not being smart enough. Not fun enough. Not sexed enough. How happy he will be. Oh! No, he must not think about today. Only think of tomorrow... next week... next month... next year... next decade... when he goes to heaven. He has to forget today. A few shots of vodka will do the trick. A little cocaine helps too. And there is that strip-tease club by the corner, better yet, that porn site with factory-made bodies that won't nag or complain.
A normal person has to forget today. He must get drunk. He must pass out. He must sexually -release. Get all the stress out. He must forget today at all costs.
But alas! Morning comes too quickly. Today is here again, and it's exactly like yesterday. A normal person must try to forget yesterday, get through today and focus on tomorrow -- and how happy he'll be. And who best to help a normal person forget yesterday and today than the "normal mind doctor"? The normal person lies down on the couch and talks about this and talks about that. He talks about unhappy childhood, unhappy thoughts, repressed desires, strange voices, feeling not good enough, smart enough, rich enough etc. The "normal mind doctor" psycho-analyzes the normal person and finds a thousand and one things not normal with him. The "normal mind doctor" then prescribes whatever he has been prescribing to other normal people. The normal person is cured -- normal again!
But morning comes again. It begins all over again. Today is exactly like yesterday. Just think of the implications of what Psychology and Psychoanalysts are saying. For hundreds of years, Psychoanalysts have been analyzing people suffering from a thousand and one kinds of mental ailments. Naturally after analyzing people for hundreds of years they've decided that people who "hear voices", see invisible things, place their faith and hope in the logically improbable, believe in what has no scientific basis, wear their emotions on their sleeves (to borrow the phrase); are cheerful, animated and happy for no apparent reason at all, are suspect. Not only suspect -- dangerous.
So, if you are reading this and believe you've heard God speak; you've felt the presence of a beloved who's departed; you've seen something that you're too afraid to tell others you've seen; you have faith that defies all logic; you believe in something that cannot be proven scientifically; you're grateful for what you have (however little); you think living today is so much more important than worrying about tomorrow; you smile even when you have no reason to; you're happy even in the midst of the most difficult times; and you are not even an African, you tell me, why should I trust you?
Is there even such a thing as a "normal" person?
About the Author: Christine Akiteng is a Cross Cultural Relations Consultant with experience in cross-cultural negotiations, problem-solving, team-building, project design, project management, project evaluation and monitoring. She has held Program Coordination and Program Management positions with diplomatic missions and international aid agencies including the British High Commission, Canadian International Development Agency and UNICEF Canada. She has also worked in Public Relations with European Union funded programme and done consulting work with IMF/World Bank and World Health Organization affiliated initiatives, as well as many Non-Government Organizations in and outside Africa. Christine is also an internationally renowned Dating and Relationships Coach, Motivational Speaker, AIDS Activist and Youth HIV/AIDS Educator. She currently lives in Toronto, Canada.
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Top-level comments on this article: (5 total)before i write this i must make clear i dislike no "race" more than my own i think all so called "races" are equal.when i first started to read i thought wow (i assumed you are of African descent) an African-American or an African Canadian etc, an African lady, (please excuse my ignorance) that thinks the same way about her race as i do about my own "whites".sometimes i think to myself wow us whites are pretty evil people look what we did to the American Native Indian, Australian Aboriginal, look at how many countries the English took over and all the damage they have caused.but then i think well there is Good and Bad in all so called "races" its just recently the whites have had the opportunity to be evil with the English having guns etc then they took over America,Australia etc centuries ago,would Africans,Asians, or any other people have done the same if they had the opportunity to back then?1. i believe there is 1 "race" the human race,2. i believe whites,Black people,Asians,Latin, etc are all equal3. we can all be saved,we all have a soul.and i think i kind of get what you said at the end of the article, is it normal to have our head in the sand,is it normal to not care about the world even when there is so much pain,sin etc.sorry i cannot fully express my thoughts as i am not a good writer.P.S i hope this didnt offend anyone like i said i think we are all equal,God Bless you ChristinePlease log in to respond to this comment.Thank you for reading and commenting. Yes, I am an African/Ugandan woman -- born and raised.Now, I am not sure what you read that made you think “i dislike no "race" more than my own”. On the contrary, I am like and love my race. And even though I live abroad, I haven’t lost the African in me. I still think I can hear God speaking; have conversations with dead people, spirits, trees, mountains, rivers, and wild animals; hear voices in the sky, in the wind and everywhere; clap, sing and dance anywhere anytime, etc. I’ve even been told I am intellectually short-changed (he-he). And I know you can’t tell by the picture above but I have a glee in my eyes and can flash that toothpaste ad smile really good… :-). And I make no apologies.The longer I live abroad, the more I appreciate the ways of my people. In the article I highlight just how misunderstood African ways are because they are being judged by Western standards of what is normal and what is not normal (if there is such a thing). It’s the absurdity of what is considered normal and normal that inspired me to write the article.I do not think of races in terms of “equal” which implies a comparison. I believe that they are all different in some ways and very much alike in others. This is my experience. I think pretending that the differences don’t exist is as bad as making those differences what divides us. I appreciate the good and try to understand what I consider the bad in different races -- including my own.At the end of the article, I challenge the reader to look within before making snap judgements. I think that most people (of all races) will agree that they do one or many of the same things Africans do, but that doesn’t make them dangerous or untrustworthy -- or not normal for that matter.You write well -- and you certainly didn’t offend me. God bless you right back! Love Always.Please log in to respond to this comment.Hello, i think you misunderstood me a little maybe not I'm not sure,When i said "i dislike no "race" more than my own i think all so called "races" are equal." - these where My thoughts (Anon's) i didn't imply that you said this or at least i didn't mean for it to sound this way.i meant that i don't think my "race" whites are the best or worst, i just think that we had the opportunity to show our worst side on a larger scale across the world,but at first i saw your picture and the name of the article and thought that you disliked your own race, it shows how quick we are to judge at times how quick I Anon was to judge, but as i read more and finished reading the article i noticed that this had nothing to do with the article and that you didn't try to get that message across,why i wrote about races is because i was quick to judge, i was too quick to conclude that you where going to talk bad about your race, (by the way you didn't).and i also wrote it to give you and your readers something to think about.like i said in my last comment i am not a good writer i notice now you misunderstood me because of my use of quotation marks "" instead of the brackets ()When I (Anon) said "we are all equal" i meant in the ways that matter to God. we are all made by God,we all have a soul,we can all do good and or evil,we all have feelings,we are all loved by God,we can all be saved.and the last thing i wrote in my first post was written about the article you wrote, the first stuff i wrote was my thoughts before i got even a quarter of a way through the article.I am actually a pretty bad writer i cant express my thoughts as clear as i would like to and my punctuation sucks the "" () proves that.God Bless.Please log in to respond to this comment.I hear you. I took it to mean you thought I dislike my race. Misunderstanding both ways -- my apologies.I also should have picked on the words “human race” to explain what you meant by "we are all equal" in the ways that matter to God. I missed that one too. See we’re of different races but we’ve already established that we have a lot in common in that we both can't express our thoughts as clear as we would like to and we both suck at punctuation…LOL! Me probably the worst on punctuation.I appreciate you adding to the article. I actually think your admission of your thoughts about your own race will give others more to think about. It may have turned out just well that we both misunderstood each other… :-).If it matters at all, I am one to care how good you write... it matters to me what heart you right with. I like yours... :-)Be richly blessed.Please log in to respond to this comment.I am one NOT to care how good you write... There we go again, I missed out on NOT... :-) and the searchwarp comment editor doesn't seem to work today.Please log in to respond to this comment.
Well dang girl, I do most of the things you write about in your last paragraph. I'm certainly not African so I can't use that as an excuse so it must be that I'm crazy.Ooops, I just read your clarification in your comments and perhaps I'm not crazy at all even though I'm generally happy even when the sky is falling and I do love to dance and clap my hands a lot for no apparent reason.You've gone off on a new path girl, your penis article was very interesting and this one I wasn't sure where we were headed. Oh well, I'm rambling with no real direction here. I just love how you put your words together even if they sometimes paint a Picaso and I can't quite make out the meaning of it all. lolPlease log in to respond to this comment.I always knew you were Cra-zy! A while ago I went to your website and read some of “inside Myla Madson’s mind” (may be not exact words) and as I read, I kept thinking who in God’s name is this person!?!? She’s cra-zy -- and I love it. Now I have “inside my mind” an image of you dancing and clapping your hands for no apparent reason. You’re off the hook insanely cra-zy…LOL
You read the penis article… LOL! I know it’s not a “normal” Searchwarp article and was really honoured that the Searchwarp team even put it out there.Thanks for coming by and leaving a comment. Means a lot!Please log in to respond to this comment.
Wow Christine, what a statement!!! This is quite profound, so true, but very profound. My wife would probably be the first one to tell you that I am the dangerous one then. My friend at work, her name is Telisa, she is also from Africa, says that she swears that I am half black. I do those things even a work, I sing, everybody know that, I laugh, love to make people laugh, and my sister has never understood why I can make decisions at the drop of a hat!!!! I told her one day, after living in San Jose Calif for over 20 some odd years, that I was moving to Arizona....in the desert??? Why? How can you just sell your house and go? I do that....and I am definately a free spirit, my wife and I have even been called Gypsies for cryin' out loud.....I have been a cowboy all of my life, in the literal since of the work, raised on a farm, grew up on a ranch, breaking horses, gettin' kicked, bit, chewed, and thrown, but I always come out of it laughing. I am also a stuntman for a local theme park we have out here, as well as for the movies....I am , half crazy so i'm told, my wife loves it!!! I was told I had to be half crazy to be on a swift boat speeding down the rivers of Vietnam, and I volunteered.....yes.....I'm dangerous, live life dangerously, make your kisses long, and keep on dancing are my rules of engagement of life....So let it be written, so let it be said!!! Do I fit? I'm not sure, but we have fun today.....we don't wait until tomorrow.....I LOVED THIS ARTICLE!!!!! CAN YOU TELL??? So, am I dangerous....I reckon so. Your friend in pen.....Gary....keep on writting!!!!!!Please log in to respond to this comment.“Gettin' kicked, bit, chewed, and thrown, but I always come out of it laughing.”
You have me cracking up prime time! What a way to leave a comment. And yes… Gary, you’re crazy… and dangerous. I don’t know why they have you out-- you should be locked up in some institution… or sent back to Africa… LOL!
You’re just my kind of person -- free spirit and sharing it around. Your wife loves it, you’re making others laugh/happy … and you’re having the time of your life doing it… why wait for tomorrow ?? I am sure you drive your sister crazy too.
"Make your kisses long, and keep on dancing" I never heard of that one before… I hope you don't kiss and dance at the same time.... you can get really dizzy... but then again that makes you dance more... that can be a sight to behold!
I like your way with words in your articles and your generous comments. I appreciate it tons!PS: Tell Telisa, her sister over here said "Hi"...Please log in to respond to this comment.
I don't even know how to comment on this one! I love this article. How did it make me feel? It made me feel that I should be more thankful for what I have; that I should not put so much importance on who I am or what I have; that I should enjoy family, friends, experiences, nature, the love of God. It made me feel that I should "lighten up", enjoy life in all its shapes and forms.It reminded me of the time I saw "The African Children's Choir"; children from war-torn countries of Africa; children who had lost their parents in civil war. I watched them dance and heard them sing, and saw the smiles on their faces and wondered how this could be. Were they normal? - yes, and wonderful. They gave me so much to consider about my own life. Was I normal? I'd love to be normal like them.Please log in to respond to this comment.David, that’s deep!I know the title is a little provocative but my hope is that it’ll help bring the conversation to the table without the PC crap. Your comment as to how you feel about the article is exactly how I hoped it’d make others feel, “what is my (own) normal?”I am very familiar with the "The African Children's Choir". I see them as the “New Face” of Africa, and believe that those "little ones" will do far more bringing Africa to the world than my generation ever did or will. I see they have touched you… :-)Thank you for taking the time to read, leave a very personal comment and for joining my fan club.Please log in to respond to this comment.
I implore that we dont assume Africa is no good place & people living here are useless. Good things come from Africa and good people out there in the first world countries originate from Africa. The Americas/Europe, etc. are clever to attract the best pepole from Africa for their benefit. These are effects of globalization and the concept of creating a diverse workforce.I'm not ashamed to say that even if Africans may have financial challenges, they are easy forgiving people and none Africans are good as enslaving other people. One good example is that of arpatheid in past years in South Africa, the whites were so harsh and brutal but Africans forgave and never return revenge when the got power. Whites would make you eat your dung for a small mistake you make, they'd take the gun and kill on the corridors, they'd burn you in your car, brutal people. Africans have hope in life after death, which is good. We all need hope to live today for tomorrow. I have said enough, more is in my blog.Please log in to respond to this comment.“The Americas/Europe, etc. are clever to attract the best people from Africa for their benefit.”Now you made me feel really guilty for leaving Africa…just kidding. I am sure you were not talking about me when you said "best people"… :-)I hear what you are saying. Africa has suffered so much from colonial rule, partitioning of Africa, slavery, apartheid and the looting of its natural resources. Africa continues to suffer from all kinds of creative exploitation not just from America/Europe, now we have China and India. And some of the things you list did and do happen to Africans, however, I don’t think it's helpful to generalize “whites” as it’s not fair to generalize all Africans as so harsh and brutal. There are good people and there are evil people, whites and Africans. We have in the most recent past also done some really so harsh and brutal things to ourselves - remember Darfur, Rwanda, Northern Uganda, the DRC, Sierra Leone etc.I agree with you that we’re easy forgiving people (I sometimes have to slap myself) and that’s why being stuck on “what they did to us” doesn’t do Africa and Africans any good. It’d be nice to see Africa rise from the ashes like the African sun and reclaim the glory we only read in history books. That’s not going to happen until we Africans make it happen.Hopefully those of us who are over here don’t think “we arrived” but are learning something from those “who know” and will bring back what we learned to rebuild Africa!I would like to read your blog. May be we can exchange some ideas on what we Africans can do for Africa!Thank you for taking the time to read and leave a comment.Please log in to respond to this comment.
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