Yangki Christine Akiteng

Okay, So You're Colour Blind -- But That Don't Impress Me Much



Posted: Friday, May 15, 2009

by
The Real People's Love Doctor

I apologize in advance if this article offends anyone.  No offense intended.  I suspect some will take offense anyway. C'est la vie!

See, any time I hear or read anything that says "Let's put this race thing behind us", I roll up my eyeballs and mutter under my breath, "Let's also howl at the full moon.  Sounds good but doesn't change anything."  And this colour-blind business, that sounds good too, but for who?

I fully understand that when people say we should move towards a colour blind society, they mean a society free from undue bias or preconceived opinions based on the colour of one's skin; a society where we all are judged not by the colour of our skin but by the content of our character.  That's a good thing, right?

That's if you're even "visible" in the first place. For people who live everyday being ignored by shop attendants and waiters, looked past by people of another colour, and basically existing as invisible members of any given majority, colour blind sounds like:

-- a color vision deficiency, the inability to perceive differences between some of the colors that others can distinguish (Wikipedia).

-- genetic condition in which people have mild to severe difficulty identifying colors. Color blind people may not be able to recognize various shades of colors and, in some cases, cannot recognize colors at all to distinguish differences in hue (Free Health Encyclopedia)

-- blind, unsighted, unable to see; a person is blind to the extent that he must devise alternative techniques to do efficiently those things he would do with sight if he had normal vision (Kenneth Jernigan)

What good is a society that has vision deficiency? A world where people have difficulty identifying or recognizing each other? One in which people are so blind to the extent that they must devise alternative techniques to do efficiently those things they would do with sight if they had normal vision?

A world where the blind are leading the blind if you ask me.  But.... children... you might insist.  They are paragons of a colour blind world.  I beg to differ!

Children have clear colour vision and can see ALL colours very well -- they just don't care what colour it is they see.  Caucasian, Asian, Mexican and South American kids point out the colour of my skin to me all the time.  I like the fact that they see me, acknowledge me and feel free to compliment or joke about my "tan" without the adult PC bullshit.  And if they say something that I find disagreeable, I can talk to and with them without all the dissociative schizophrenic type behaviour we see in adults.

I can't say the same for people who use "I am colour blind" as an alternative technique to do efficiently those things they would do if they were honest enough to come out and say "I am going to pretend that you're invisible". 

Before we can truly become a society that judges people not by the colour of their skin but by the content of their character, we must first WANT (or have the desire) to see the "invisible" among us; and ACKNOWLEDGE that they may not look like us, speak like us or do things the way we do, but like us, they too have character -- whichever side of the colour pallet.  Until then, please don't give me the colour blind crap! 

And don't tell me "Let's put this race thing behind us" or "Let's just get rid of the word race' altogether" either. Sounds good but doesn't change anything.  What will begin to put race behind us is a more open, frank, respectful and meaningful discussion on race.  Just having friends or relatives of different races is not enough if we are tip-toeing around why race is such a sore topic in the first place.

Show me someone who can have an open, frank, respectful and meaningful discussion on race and I'll show you a person free from undue bias or preconceived opinions based on the colour of one's skin

Since we are talking race, have you taken the "The Implicit Association Test"?  I took the test last November just after President Barack Obama's speech on race.  The results were shocking to me and to every one of my friends (black, white and brown) who took the test.

I urge all of you to take the test and see what you really think about race.

 
Internationally recognized Relationships Coach and author of three popular eBooks: Dating Your Ex, The Art of Seducing Out Of Fullness and Playing Hard To Get the Love Way, Yangki Christine Akiteng has devoted years of her life helping men and women create loving, authentic, exciting and fulfilling relationships. Having lived and worked in Africa, Europe and North America, Yangki brings a unique international perspective and multicultural understanding to her work. For more articles and information on the services she offers to singles and couples please visit: www.torontosnumber1datedoctor.com

Ask your questions, read answers and join discussions on HOT Topics at: www.askthelovedoctor.com. All are welcome!
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More comments
» left by Lawrence Jones
2 years 265 days ago.
30 fans.
Christine,
 
 
   With all do respect to your position and your aritcle, you do not have to apology for the statements you have made. I agree with every thing you have said 200%. If anyone get's offend or does want to read it, tough. Then Search Warp is not the place for them. I make no apologies for what I am about to say.
  
   America created this thing called racism. America owes the African and the African-American an apology and every other nationality that falls prey to it fangs of racial injustice. We as a people (black folk) and all others must never never never except racism as the status quo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
 
   I am a Black Man (African-American) I choose to define myself as such and I embrace my African Heritage. I was never born with a silver spoon in my mouth or privileged to be one of the special ones (one of the ones that white people like). As a black man, in America, you can never breath the fresh air of exceptence and be appeciated for just who you are as a human being. And that is a whole separate issue within itself (being black male in America).
 
   You are put under a microscope and dissected daily to see if you are worthy of respect and dignity. It is a shame....... shame...... shame, before God and man, that people treat each other this way.
 
    I pity those that practice and treat others with such disdainment. They operate from false paradigms of superiority and inferitority complexes that distort their reality. For exapmle, they, the racist, treat everyone like they are beneath them(superiority based on skin color and class), and think everyone should look upon themselves as being inferior to them.
 
-----Just a plug for David P.
 
In addition, I would dare not try to speak for David. I am sure he very well capable of doing that for himself, but just to give little clarity to what he wrote. He did an excellent job in expressing how his family deal with racism.  I applaud him for his effords, but unfortunately there are others that don't practice the same thing. Yes, Christine I understand that you didn't write your article as a rebuttal to David's article, I just wanted to make a statement about it since he had commented.
 
I see that he was very sincere in what he wrote. I was humbled and brought to sense of all. I appreciate what he has done to break the chains of racism in his own lineage. It is a start in the right direction that we all have the power to do. As stated in one of  Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr speeches, " We all can be great because we all have the power to serve." We can serve one another by appreciating each others differences and respecting each others opinions.
 
Therefore, I welcome dialogue fueled with honesty, respect, fairness in judgement, sound reasoning, and compassion for others.  This type of dialogue will destory and wipe out the roots of racism that plaques our society, country, and the world.  Thank you David and Christine for haveing the courage and boldness to speak truth to power that has no power if we call it out and rebuke the sin of racism and speak truth in love. 
 
   
 I submit to everyone that is reading this, the question What are you doing in your family, work place, neighborhoods, and world to make this place we call America and in life better for those that don't share the same background, culture, religion, class, and last but not least, skin color.
 
It doesn't take alot of money, know how, or time. If you give of yourself just a little we can have heaven on Earth, not just in the good by in by......(heaven)
 
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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 265 days ago.
103 fans.
I thank you Lawrence for taking the time to both expound on David ‘s article and also leave a comment that comes right from your heart.  This is what I was hoping for when I wrote the article -- people speaking from the heart even if it’s to disagree with me. 
 
America created this thing called racism.
 
I think that racism existed long before America was even born.  I don’t know who started it but it’s everywhere where different races co-exist.  In all honesty, I believe that in Canada we “blacks” get it better than Native people and Aboriginals.  I am sure you can see that I am intentionally trying not to let the “American experience” steal the show… :-)
 
I agree that racism should never be accepted as status quo anywhere in the world! The superiority and inferiority complexes based on colour of skin allows even the really dumb people on the “superior side” to claim “better than” status just because of colour of skin.  I also think that the same standard should be used on intelligence, respect and dignity.  Stereotypes and systematic manipulation of so called "scientifc findings" have a lot to do with it.  That’s why we need “dialogue fueled with honesty, respect, fairness in judgement, sound reasoning, and compassion for others.  This type of dialogue will destroy and wipe out the roots of racism that plaques our society, country, and the world”  It’s hard to fall into treating others as "less than" when your soul and heart know otherwise.  You have to have a very low self-esteem or be born evil to go against your own soul and heart.
 
Since you are on African America willing to talk this racism thing in the face,  may be you can explain to me something that as a dating coach still bangles my mind. I hear that African Americans men and women date someone based fairness of their skin and the texture of their hair.  I chat on a site on interracial dating and get amused when African Americans get ticked off because someone said they looked “African”.  Another one who felt fair skinned and with "good hair" felt "insulted" that White guys only want to date “African looking women” who she said are very black and wear braids.  One of them actually told me to get rid of the “Afro” because I am a beautiful woman whose beauty is obscured by the “nappy hair”. What’s that about????…:-) 
 
I apologize if I put you on the spot, but after reading your informed, honest and passionate comment, I thought now might be the only time I ever get an answer that might make sense to me as an African proud of my dark skin and hair texture.
 
With your permission I’d like to extend your call to:  What are you doing in your family, work place, neighborhoods, and world to make THE WORLD a better place for those that don't share the same background, culture, religion, class, and last but not least, skin color.
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» left by Lawrence Jones 2 years 261 days ago.
30 fans.
Dear Christine,
 
 I am sad that you have to experience the Black Folks that have limit themselves in there minds and existence only to date light skin and straight haired Black Folks.  It is a sad reality (which is intra-racism). That topic is another whole book and dialogue.
 
For those African-American men and women that lend themselves to the subconscious mind of self hatred, I submitted to you the scares and the by product of "Chattel Slavery".   When a people have been stripped of their native tongue, religion, family, land, and culture, you create an empty vessel that can be filled with brain washing and self hatred paradigms that can be used to manipulate them to self destruct.
 
This philosophy and theory of controlling the enslaved African was clear according to famous slave owner named Willie Lynch of West Indies. His famous letter to his fellow slave owners was entitled the "Willie Lynch Letter" ( in Virgina 1712).  In the letter he explains how to effectively control yours slaves.  For example, he said beat the slave using another slave to do it, put the light skin slave in the house, put the dark skin slave in the field, treat the light skin better than the dark skin, put old against the young, young against the old, woman against the man, man against the woman, rape the women in front of their men, separate the children from their parents, and  have the boys rape their own mothers.  Graphic as it may seem this methodology worked and still is in affect today.  Meaning the shackles no longer are on the  arms, legs and neck, but on the mind.
 
Therefore,  some Black Folks operate from a slave plantation mentality.  For those that only date light skin and straight haired blacks, this simple means that they hate themselves and want to be and look white.  If they are associated with someone that is not white, but have some of the physical charateristics like white people they feel accepted and validated in there minds by Whites Folks (master). 
 
Christine, if you would like to read more about this twisted way of thinking, well you can read Souls of Black Folks by W. E. B. DuBois, Mis-Education of Negro by Dr. Carter G. Woodson (Father of Black History Month), and on history of the African in America Before the Mayflower by Dr. Lerone Bennett, Jr..
 
The above depiction of what occurred in the past is not an indictment against White Folks as a whole, but on humanity.  We must not and I believe we will not allow such injustice to occur ever again.
 
Christine, I pray this answers your questions and open up your understanding about the devastation that racism causes and continue cause.
 
For those of you reading this comment I pray that you find yourself on the side of being part of the solution, and not part of the problem. We must terminate  and cure humanity of the virus of racism.
 
 
 
 
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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 260 days ago.
103 fans.
Thank you, Lawrence. It makes so much sense but very sad at the same time. The same thing is happening in Africa -- a colonial mentality -- except that it’s not about skin or hair, but spite for the traditions and customs that have sustained our people for thousands of years.
 
I read pieces here and there of the Mis-Education of Negro, but I don’t think it really sank in since I had no direct experience of racism as part of a minority.  Also as I mentioned, here in Canada it’s very subtle and most of the blacks here are recent immigrants with almost the same experience.  Following the 2008 presidential campaigns gave me a window into racism in America.  I am going to read the whole book and those that you mention too.
 
There is so much I need to learn.  I very much appreciate you taking the time to even respond.  Thank you!
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» left by AP from USA 2 years 213 days ago.
.

Since mention was made of the topic of the house
and the field slave I just wanted to note that
this false concept that so many people have
that the lighter-complexioned chattel slaves
had it easier or thought they were better
than the darker-complexioned slaves - and
/ or largely relaxed in the big house while
the darker-complexioned slaves suffered
in the fields is very much (just like the
infamous Willie Lynch Letter Hoax) all VERY
MUCH AN URBAN MYTH (and, is one which,
in nearly every way thats possible, completely
defies the true historical recorded account).

The historical record shows that
those enslaved people who were of a
lighter-complexion (i.e. mulatto-lineage)
and that were found on the continental
United States during the antebellum
(chattel-slavery) era were actually treated
MUCH WORSE than were those enslaved
people who were of a darker-complexion.

In fact, the record shows that most of the White
people (especially the White women) tended
to look upon the lighter-complexioned slaves
as being mere mongrels of miscegenation
(resulting largely from the rapes caused by the
plantation Overseers); in their disgust at the
sight of these slaves insisted that they
be banished to the fields; and also then
purposefully reserved most of the big house
positions (ex. mammy, cook, driver, etc.) for
the darker-complexioned slaves who most of
the White people had perceived as being more loyal,
more docile, less competitive, etc., and, even more
important, they were also of a skin tone which
could never cause them to be seen as being
any part-white (and even worse, perceived as
possibly also being a member of the family
as it were of a given plantation Owner).

And this maltreatment was generally even much
more so the case if the lighter-complexioned
enslaved person was even remotely suspected
(by, say, a wife, sister or daughter who ran the big
house, while a male family member ran the plantation)
of possibly being the offspring of a given plantation
Owner (or his son, or father, or brother, or any other
male found in the plantation Owners White family).

In addition, the few lighter-complexioned enslaved
people that were actually permitted to do any work
in the big house were (as a punishment for having
the lowly status of mongrel and in order to make sure
that they did not become too uppity) kept under a
much more severe work supervision (by both the
White women who ran the plantation household and
also by the darker-complexioned enslaved people
who had been placed over the lighter-complexioned
enslaved people and given various rewards in an
exchange for the promise to keep an eye on them)
than were most of the (more trusted and seemingly
endeared) darker-complexioned enslaved people.

Books by Deborah Gray White; Paula Giddings; bell
hooks; J. California Cooper; William Wells Brown;
etc. expose the truth about the urban-myth and
show that the lighter-complexioned enslaved
people received NO special treatment and were,
instead (due to being seen as mere mongrels of
miscegenation) usually treated much worse than
were most darker-complexioned enslaved people.

The hatred, fear and mistrust that many of the antebellum
and post-antebellum era White southerners felt toward the
people who were both of a light-complexion (mulatto-lineage)
and were also chattel-slaves, is very strongly presented
in the D.W. Griffith racist film Birth of a Nation where
pretty much all the trouble, tragedy and dangers found
experienced by White southern families in the film is
falsely presented as being caused by uppity Mulattoes
who needed to be taught their place among White people.

(i.e. they needed to be beaten, raped, lynched, etc. by the
proud White people who had been reared to make it clear
that they felt no connection to any non-White person).

Hope this information is helpful

& that everyone has a great day.

-- AP 

.
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» left by Anonymous
2 years 265 days ago.
Very interesting discussion. I think there has been progressive change in the positive direction. Not for everyone, but as a statistical thing I notice younger people more integrated. I don't know that they are color blind, necessarily, but at least less influenced by Old Jim Crow.
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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 265 days ago.
103 fans.
I had to Google “Old Jim Crow” to understand what you mean…:-) . I can’t say much about particular issues that drive colour divisions since I know very little of USA, but  I think that by electing a POTUS who happens to be “black” your country is may actually be moving towards a positive direction.  Let’s hope this is just the beginning of a real dialogue because just sweeping stuff under the carpet with “the colour of the President’s skin” will backfire.
 
I do agree with you that young people everywhere are changing the colour landscape.  That's a very good thing!
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» left by LeahG Artist
2 years 264 days ago.
192 fans. Follow LeahG Artist on twitter!
Hi Christine,
 
Great article, but re the kids thing. I am reminded of my own childhood and actually when it came to people, I was 'colour blind'.
 
If youd've asked me then what 'colour' my friends were, I'd have had to stop and think about it.
 
Skin colour was no more noticeable to me than eye colour, hair colour or the colour of their t-shirt that day and that's a fact.
 
This is a matter of simple psychology. If there is an abundance of something you cease to notice it and where I grew up it was very multi-cultural and very multi- coloured.
 
Example, in my class alone we had this mix:
 
Italian
 
Chinese
 
Japanese
 
Greek
 
Iranian
 
Turkish
 
West Indian
 
Irish
 
White English
 
Iraq
 
Indian
 
We also had sikh and hindu's represented
 
I've probably left someone out.
 
Some people won't let go of the colour , race thing and it's not those who claim to be 'colour blind'.

Re the comment above about America inventing racism (which you also reject)
America is not the 'world' though I know many Americans who think it is.

As you rightly note, racism is alive to some degree in every culture, in every country, always has been since the first tribes started killing each other.

No one has a monopoly on racism.


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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 264 days ago.
103 fans.
Thank you VERY MUCH, Leah.  My point exactly.  The fact that you can remember that your class was a mix of Italian, Chinese, Japanese, Greek, Iranian, Turkish, West Indian, Irish, White English, Iraq, Indian and many more means that you SAW that there were different races/colours in your class, you just didn’t care what colour you saw.
 
You SAW (with phsical eyes) the colour of someone’s skin but you also SAW (with spiritual eyes or heart or soul) the person as so much more than just the colour of his or her skin.  For me the problem is not so much the semantics but how the word “colour blind” is so often used when we do not want to acknowledge the presence of people of other races/colours or admit the challenges they face everyday because of the colour of their skin. 
 
I’d have the same problem if someone said, “I do not see people with disability as having a disability” then the same person walks by a blind person trying to find his guide-stick that has fallen on the ground.  And when challenged about this behaviour the person says, “What?! I did not insult him. I could never insult a blind person.  I wasn’t raised like that!”  Well, it’s true that this person did not say anything mean to the blind person and it’s true he or she was raised never to insult blind people, but he or she FAILED TO DO SOMETHING to make the life of the blind person -- at that particular moment in time -- less challenging.
 
I don’t want to be “blind”, (I once was blind but now I see…lol).  I want to DO SOMETHING about it (with my eyes wide open and all the lights of compassion and empathy turned on) .  Being "blind" is not an option I can live with.  It’s one reason I vigorously promote cross-cultural competency and better communication and relations across races/colours. We -- people of all races and colours-- are stuck with each other in this thing we call earth.  Unless there is peace, and joy and freedom for others (race, colour, religion, class, physical/mental/emotional challenges etc), there can be no real peace or joy or freedom for us.  This is what I teach my childen.
 
Thank you for your input.  I appreciate it!
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» left by LeahG Artist 2 years 264 days ago.
192 fans. Follow LeahG Artist on twitter!
Hi Christine

I'm not sure whether you read my latest article about the BNP.

I am doing something about it as you say.

I have so far managed to persuade (with BNP's own policies) two people who were going to vote for the BNP not to. I never advised them which way to vote, I merely presented the BNP's own policies to them which they were not aware of.

The BNP has a a history of a racist agenda but they've managed to convince a lot of Brits that this is all in thte past. I wasn't convinced so when some people around me said they were voting BNP I looked at their website and found what I regard to be 'racist' policies.

I presented the facts, not an opinion to these people that I know. On reflection, they have decided not to vote that way.

It is quite scary that people are voting for any party without knowing what that party's agenda is.

Education is the key.

The blindness you refer to is the refusal to look, see and learn from mistakes of the past.

Here's hoping one day we get there.



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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 264 days ago.
103 fans.
No Leah, the blindness I am talking about is NOT the refusal to look, see and learn from mistakes of the past. This is not about PAST MISTAKES, this is about NOW - the new and “improved”  and different faces of racism and repjudice --  and people using “I am colour blind” as an excuse for treating someone of another race/colour as if he or she is invisible or refusing to acknowledge the challenges people of another race/colour face everyday because of the colour of their skin.  Aaron Taylor’s in his comment sums it up best “racial reconciliation from the black perspective and they have been very eye opening.”  Substitute “black person” with any race, colour of the skin, culture, religion, class etc. This is “SEEING it from the perspective of a person of another colour”.
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» left by LeahG Artist 2 years 263 days ago.
192 fans. Follow LeahG Artist on twitter!
I don't think that people who claim to be colour 'blind' fall into the group you mention.

Most enlightened people are aware of the struggles of others and the prejudices that blight their lives.

Obese people face prejudice for example, right down to stares, laughter, abuse, not being allowed on flights, rides. Not being catered for re clothing, shoes etc. They are turned down for jobs, turned down in romance. They aren't represented in the media, on TV etc.

No one campaigns for their rights.

People are different in many regards, not just re colour and people pick and mix what to be prejudiced about.

This lack of giving a damn is very broad.

Do you know how often a speeding motorist has said to me when I say:

'please slow down you might hit a child'

They say:

'It's ok, I'm insured'.

I am appalled by that attitude, that a life to them is seen in monetary terms only and how taking a life will affect their pocket rather than how taking that life will affect the family and the child.

There has been a dampening down of morality in society. It goes way beyond colour.

We need consideration, tolerance and for people in general regardless of differences.

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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 263 days ago.
103 fans.
"I don't think that people who claim to be colour 'blind' fall into the group you mention".
 
Not all of them but most of those I know DO!  That’s why I wrote the article.
 
"We need consideration, tolerance and for people in general regardless of differences".
 
I agree.  Unless there is peace, and joy and freedom for others (race, colour, religion, class, physical/mental/emotional challenges etc), there can be no real peace or joy or freedom for us.
 
This article however is about COLOUR hence the focus on colour.
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» left by Aaron Taylor
2 years 264 days ago.
I loved this article! As a white person, I suspect that I'm largely clueless about the systematic racism that African Americans feel every day. I've been reading some books on racial reconciliation from the black perspective and they have been very eye opening. They generally echo the sentiment in this article. Thank you for refusing to be silent!
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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 264 days ago.
103 fans.
With your comment, you personified what I am struggling to put in words.  What you are doing is exactly what all of us should be doing --  wherever we may be in the world!  I won’t be silenced... I am on a mission… :)  Asante sana for the support!!!!
 
All the best with the Book!!!
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» left by sue thom
from nj
2 years 264 days ago.
hi christine,
 
i think i could have such a talk.
 
i was raised in morristown, new jersey, and we were black and white, raised to not worry about color or ethnicity, as long as the person we were involved with was honest, kind, and trustworthy.
 
my mother was a nurse, and took care of anyone who walked into her emergency room, with care, compassion, and dignity, and knowing my mother, i can honestly say that race never played a part in her doing so.
 
her best friend for many years before she passed away, had dark black skin. they worked together in a small space for 8 hours a day, more time than they spent with their own families. that was over 20 years ago, and mildred was her name. my mother saw past colors, and taught her children to do the same, as i have now taught my children.
 
3 kids, a ton of friends each, and all different nationalities. my son is in the air force, and his roomate was black. he never gave it a thought, because that's how i raised him. my daughter has a variety of friends from all over, with all different tones of color.
 
color means nothing to me, it never did. what means something to me is what type of person i'm dealing with, and what their good and bad qualities are. those don't come because they are a different color.
 
race has never been an issue in my home growing up, or my kids' home growing up.
i never could understand the color controversy, even when i was a little girl.
therapy tells us to make peace with our problems of the past, deal with the feelings and thoughts, make a change in our mindset, and move on.
Jesus talks about forgiveness.
we have never been a perfect society, but we are making progress.
i was taken advantage of because i was naieve, i wanted to believe everyone was telling the truth. i was hurt badly many times, but i had to come to terms with my past and sort through all the baggage, and drop it all, for me to be able to move on.
others were taken advantage of because they were black, others because they wore glasses, others because their eyes were crossed. pain is pain. it hurts and affects the same, no matter what the reason.
maybe if we stop talking about it, and move past it, it will no longer exist,
best regards,
sue thom
 
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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 263 days ago.
103 fans.
Hi Sue, thank you for your comment, and I respect the fact that race has never been an issue in your home or for you growing up, or your kids' home growing up”.  I think that is a good thing.
 
However, race is an issue for the people living everyday judged by the colour of their skin.  I don’t know how bad it is that side of America but Lawrence’s comment above “As a black man, in America, you can never breath the fresh air of acceptance and appreciation for just who you are as a human being. And that is a whole separate issue within itself (being black male in America).” tells me IT’S PRETTY HARD.  I cried when I read those words. I’ve only lived judged by the colour of my skin for a few years of my life.  Imagine someone who has lived it all his life and the lives before him. I don't care who says what, NOBODY, NOBODY has to live like that!!!!  IT'S JUST PLAIN WRONG.
 
Colour may mean nothing to you, and you may be living your life with race “not an issue” but think of Lawrence and people like him.  What is it like for them daily when they walk the streets unable to breath acceptance and appreciation.  Walk a mile in his shoes -- a few yards even.
 
I am a strong believer in forgiveness.  I just don’t however believe “maybe if we stop talking about it, and move past it, it will no longer exist” is the way to get there.

Imagine someone standing on your foot RIGHT NOW and when you say “Ouch!  That hurts”, the other person says “Get over it” or “Stop being oversensitive, it doesn’t even hurt that bad” or "stop talking about it, and you'll no longer feel the pain" or just acts as if it’s not your foot they are standing on.  May be the person even says “forgive already” but is still standing on your foot. Even if you can tolerate the pain and even if you can easily forgive others,  wouldn’t you also want that person to acknowledge that she is standing on your foot and you are hurting.  Forget about them acknowledging their actions and your pain (some people will never do that!), wouldn’t you want her to step off your foot so you can walk and do things like everyone else?  Even if it’s just to breath acceptance and appreciation?
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» left by LeahG Artist 2 years 263 days ago.
192 fans. Follow LeahG Artist on twitter!
Re living as 'Lawrence' did and being a person of a different colour.

You forget Christine, we whites are a different colour, we are ALL different colours.

I have been on the receiving end of racism as a white person on a daily basis. It all depends on where you live.

I once lived in a part of London where whites were the minority and I rec'd racism from blacks and Indians who were the majority population.

I was called names in the street. I was refused service in shops and I was followed and intimidated by the men. Jobs in that area went predominantly to non whites too so there was prejudice against whites in the work place.

I didn't need to experience racism to understand it.




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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 263 days ago.
103 fans.
Thank you for echoing my point once again.  My ref. to this particular black experiece which by the way is different from mine is to illustrate a point about empathy and did not mean (or forget) that whites too are a different colour.  If you carefully read my article this is what I wrote: 
 
For people who live everyday being ignored by shop attendants and waiters, looked past by people of another colour, and basically existing as invisible members of any given majority.
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» left by sue thom from nj 2 years 263 days ago.
hi christine,
thank you for responding.
my point is; there are many who either by choice, or affliction, have something to keep them standing out in society, whether it be big ears, a cleft palate, being overweight, or having 2 thumbs, as my grandfather did. we have a black president now, although, because his mother was white, i think the scales are tipped against him, and that in itself, even though not because he's black, but because he is half white, is a form of prejudice that is just as bad.
i personally voted for Obama because i thought he was the best man for the job, and i still believe so. color never played a role.
if someone was stepping on my toe, i have choices. i can ask them to get off, or i can learn tolerance, patience, and understanding from the situation. i won't learn anything if i am stuck in thinking about what i'm going to do in defense, or revenge.  being upset the person stepped on it, and  not dealing with it in the best way, is my dilemma to deal with. if i let my anger fester and grow, the act of stepping on my toe no longer becomes the issue.
i think we, the people, deserve credit for moving away from the prejudices and harm of years ago, but not if we don't let go and let God heal and guide us to a better way. we simply do not have to allow prejudice wherever we see it, in order to move our society in a more positive direction.
we need to be more compassionate and tolerant of the poor, the homeless, the afflicted, and gays and lesbians. now, there is no difference in the pain and abuse of being looked down on, made fun of, ignored, and ostracized. it all feels the same, no matter if it's because we have red hair, white or black skin, curly hair, if we are democrat or republican, Catholic or Protestant, or if we speak with a lisp, etc.
pain is pain. 
and maybe i feel this way because my father did exactly as you said in your reply, as did my mother: if it hurts when you bend your arm, don't bend it; if you don't feel good, suck it up and get to school.
if we continue to reiterate our feelings on race issues, they will only dwell and snowball, but if we allow each other to be human beings, spiritual entities, who mean no harm to anyone, regardless of what their class, color, size, weight, eye color, etc., and practice what we preach, we can keep the positive change flowing.
thanks for listening,
my best regards,
sue
 
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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 263 days ago.
103 fans.
Sue, thanks for engaging in the discussion.  We’re going to have to agree to disagree on what choices we make on this particular issue. I may be wrong but it seems you see only two choices 1) learn tolerance, patience, and understanding from the situation, or ) be stuck in thinking about what i'm going to do in defense, or revenge.  The choice for you is to learn tolerance, patience, and understanding, stop talking about it and hope that with time it’ll just go away on it’s own.  This is your choice and I respect you for it.
 
I see another choice. I have never shied away from directly confronting a controversial issue with honesty, understanding compassion, empathy and non-violence.  Yes, we need to be more compassionate, tolerant, patient and understanding.  But as I said in my article just talk of what we NEED TO DO day in and day out sounds good but nothing will change if we don’t actually DO SOMETHING.  If we actually did what we talk about (compassionate and tolerant of the poor, the homeless, the afflicted, and gays and lesbians etc) just in the articles on Searchwarp alone, we’d make our world a better place.
 
My choice is to DO SOMETHING that will change the direction of the conversation on race/colour/religion in away that we can learn from different perspectives and not just be focused on thinking that the world as we know it is all that there is.  We have a lot to learn from people who don't look like us, talk like us or act like us.
 
ACTION isn’t always about anger, defense, or revenge -- that’s that is REACTION born out of fear and powerlessness. NO ACTION (“I don’t have that problem, I don’t have to do anything about it”) comes from the same place --fear and powerlessness.   When one person is hurt by racism or prejudice, we all hurt, the whole world hurts!
 
Thank you for all your input!  I appreciate it.
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» left by Anonymous
2 years 263 days ago.
Like Sue, I voted for Obama because I thought he was better qualified, and had better ideas. However, my vote was never conditional on Obama "acting white" or losing his ethnic identity.
 
A couple of things come to mind:
 
- Black people are more race conscious than white people. White people don't generally write, sing or produce films about the white experience, or racial injustice. I think we honestly don't care because it's just not an issue with us, unless someone else makes it an issue. There are exceptions, possibly, but that's exactly what they are is exceptions.
 
- White people do have an expectation, a thinking in terms of racial superiority, where any person in authority is supposed to behave in a way that seems more "white". This isn't just about the President, but even black police officers are really expected to enforce white man's laws in a white kind of way; and black soldiers, unimpeachably brave as they are, are expected to prosecute the white man's national policy.
 
I think being black, Obama could really turn the tide of U.S. hegemony by acting black. His diplomacy with Iran, or North Korea. Stop acting so white, Obama, you don't have to, and we must not expect it. George Bush acted white, and look at all the enemies he accrued. He expected every other country to live up to his white "World Order", and when they didn't, he went to war with them. Hubris. Hegemony. White Makes Right thinking.
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» left by LeahG Artist 2 years 263 days ago.
192 fans. Follow LeahG Artist on twitter!
Hi anon, the whites in the UK aren't allowed to write, sing or crow about being white. It's considered racist.

A 'Sir' (knighted) was recently taken to court for flying the English flag in is own garden after a non English group protested. The case was eventually thrown out when the medals came out but before that the 'Sir' was very much in 'hot water' for daring to pay tribute to his own country of birth.

It's a fine line between being proud and acting superior.
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» left by Jeff Brown 2 years 263 days ago.
145 fans. Follow Jeff Brown on twitter!
"Black people are more race conscious than white people. White people don't generally write, sing or produce films about the white experience, or racial injustice. I think we honestly don't care because it's just not an issue with us, unless someone else makes it an issue. There are exceptions, possibly, but that's exactly what they are is exceptions."

If you are the power, you don't think about race because you move about in freedom. If oppressed, you think about what is oppressing you; in this case "race." Too many in power don't see the plight of those oppressed. MLK wrote his Letter from Birmingham jail just for this reason. Members of the white coalition were saying "wait" be patient. MLK said that "negros" have been waiting for over 300 years and that according to the Law of the Land, their rights were overdue.
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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 263 days ago.
103 fans.
“If you are the power, you don't think about race because you move about in freedom. If oppressed, you think about what is oppressing you; in this case "race." Too many in power don't see the plight of those oppressed”.
 
Thank you Jeff for taking the words right out of my mouth and phrasing the issue better than I could ever be able to... :-)
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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 263 days ago.
103 fans.
Thank you for joining the discussion Anonymous above.  Interesting angles you bring...  :-).
 
I am personally grateful for African Americans writing, singing or producing films about the black experience, or racial injustice.  African education system is still very colonially designed to brain wash Africans into inferiority complex.  Until the film “Roots” most of us had never even heard of slavery.  We saw African Americans as the “lucky ones who managed to get to the riches” and envied them.  We were told if we work hard at school and get good education, we too would “Come to America!”  After roots there was total disbelief (to this day some Africans can’t bring themselves to accept what really happened), anger and even rioting on the streets, people wailing and weeping like they had just lost a relative.  That was followed by hunger for “The Truth” about slavery.  The writing, singing and films produced by blacks helped a great deal.  As the African American story evolves, we all evolve from a painful past to a more hopeful future.  This is why President Obama’s election is as historic to Africans and to the world as it is to the USA -- a story of a racial healing process.
 
“I think being black, Obama could really turn the tide of U.S. hegemony by acting black”.
 
I have a problem with ‘Acting white” or “Acting black”.  Neither of them is a compliment.  These are stereotypes that in my opinion we should get rid of if we want to “put the race thing behind us”.  I’ve had people ask me why I don’t say ‘em or gettin’ or don’t “talk with attitude” or say “Giiiiiirl’” or do the “head-thing” (like Tyra Banks!).   According to them I am supposedly acting white. Am I now supposed to “act black” to fit someone else stereotype of me when all my life I have always said them or getting and naturally have a very low-pitch voice?
 
When I worked in a cubicle, I got the same lecturing about “acting black” when I had my speaker phones on and dancing to a tune (while sitting on my work station) or stopped strangers just to say “hi” or gleefully jumped up and down upon seeing a friend I had not seen for a while.
 
As for President Obama, has it ever occurred to anyone that President Obama is just acting “Barack Hussein Obama, Jr.?” 
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» left by straight talk
2 years 263 days ago.
111 fans. Follow straight talk on twitter!
Christine good job as usual. Well I took the test on race and found surprisingly but not " Your data suggest a slight automatic preference for African American compared to European American."  I felt in my case that was in large part due to my beliefs about the poor and disenfranchised  which certainly is applicable to peole of color anywhere you look around this earth. Also in holding a some what unpopular perspective of the European system of government  even with all its professed social programs for people. I find their leadership more condescending even while professing social concerns. Now I didn't like the test in total because I really have a more equal perspective of people and tend to reley more on works and deeds then anything else. Anyway. Intersting as a test. best wishes.
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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 263 days ago.
103 fans.
It had to be you to take the test, Robert!  I took the test because I try to hold myself to a very high standard when it comes to my own actions. Race is such a personal thing that we all can start acting like “dissociative schizophrenics” without even knowing it…:-)

" I felt in my case that was in large part due to my beliefs about the poor and disenfranchised  which certainly is applicable to people of color anywhere you look around this earth".

Very interesting observation.  I used to think that black people in Canada where the poorest and most disenfranchised until I started taking interest in Native American studies, aboriginal culture and really seeing things from their perspective.  I have so much admiration how these people live their lives with the dignity they do.

I just wish more people were like you, stop the intense navel-gazing and develop more consciousness for the plight of those living daily on the edges of society.  May be that’s just the African “I am Because We Are” in me speaking. I was raised to understand that “I am what I am because of who we all are” (Ubuntu Spirit), it’s hard to feel joy, freedom or peace in the face of the suffering of others.  I just can’t do it.  I may be wrong but I see you can’t either and that’s one reason I feel you and I are connected by this “spirit” …  :-)
 
Thanks and best regards ("you and I are in this together": courtesy of Bruce's dictionary)
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» left by Jeff Brown
2 years 263 days ago.
145 fans. Follow Jeff Brown on twitter!
Racism is alive and well and living in America. It's just that PC has made it unpopular. I remember watching an outtake from a riot somewhere in the 60's and a tall white police office was spewing some of the most racist things down to a short, young black man (the height in favor of white enforcing the message). Live and on TV! And that's just a few short years ago, in terms of history. I've had my students write on this topic and tell me some of the most racist stories about being "Arab looking" shortly after 9/11 and what they went through. Or being Asian, Latino, African American and taking it from the ignorant and certainly not color blind. Their color acuity being razor sharp and dead on; their venomous attacks equally acquit.

I've studied this issue extensively and have had personal experience with racial bias. One time a woman called looking for me and spoke to my wife. Later the woman called back and left a message saying, "I called before and spoke to your maid or nanny but you weren't home. I'll call again." Well, she does take care of the house and kids, but she's also my wife. Her Latin accent giving the woman the notion she worked for me, the white man.

I have been nauseated by racial attitudes and found it most upsetting to read in MLK's Letter from Birmingham jail. If one can get through it without tearing up, never mind reading it several times without doing so, his / her heart has certainly been hardened by race.

But mere color or difference has turned one against the other for centuries. Even difference in sex has caused injustice. Our great founding fathers, Thomas Jefferson and John Adams, found woman only capable of bearing children and tending to "homely duties." Woman not being able to vote, own land, politic, or get a job worthy of their keep until the early 20th century.

I've written several articles on this issue and taught it in my classes for years. For example, the reason for immigration being such a hot button has little to do with rights but mostly with race. People still see those of color or of difference as being inferior, irresponsible, lazy, unintelligent, or unworthy of the common comforts of the "superior" or "civilized" race (what great hypocrisy can be found here?). It happened to the Indian who reminded the colonists of the inferior Irish; it happened to African Americans; it happened to the Japanese and Chinese (the only race to have congress create an act to keep them out); it has been happening to the Mexican for centuries and continues so; on and on.

And it is sad and sadder still that so many liberals speak to cultural diversity when their friends and acquaintances are predominantly white, even failing to venture forth to mingle with white conservatives never mind those of differing race.

Yes, my friend, racism and color acuity is alive and well. Mr. King would be glad at the great strides made but would also not be blind to the great strides left to be made. Peace to you and yours. Keep 'em awake and rage on into that good night.

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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 263 days ago.
103 fans.
"Spewing some of the most racist things….  Live and on TV"
 
Jeff, I’ll take that kind of “open and direct assault” anytime than have someone say “I am colour blind” and proceed to say some of the most racially insensitive and racially condescending things or just act like I don’t exist. 
 
The examples you mention… your students, wife, immigration etc. echo my argument here.  When some is treating you unfairly because of who you are, your soul just knows it, PC or no PC.
 
That’s why I have a problem with people saying “I am just not conscious of race/colour”.  It’s not about YOU, and how YOU feel, it’s about the other person and how your actions may be hurting him or her as a person of another race or colour.  If your actions can in any way hurt someone else of another race or colour PLEASE BE CONSCIOUS OF RACE OR COLOUR! 
 
The way I usually tell the PC bluff from the real thing is how when the tables are turned, the same supposedly “not conscious of race/colour” all of a sudden become conscious of how they were/are being treated unjustly because of their race or colour of their skin.  They once were blind but now they see!
 
There are and there will be people who are overly sensitive and who’ll take offense at anything, or react in jerk-knee fashion to anything race/colour but that is no excuse not to be conscious of your own words and actions.  We’re stuck with each other on this planet, and it’s getting “smaller” by the byte, we’d better learn how to live with each other (different races, colours, religions, cultures etc) side by side.
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» left by Nila Smith
2 years 259 days ago.
10 fans.
I'm not sure I am smart enough to even join this conversation, but I want to say that I have learned a few things as a result of the article and the discussions that have followed.
 
I was raised in "rural America" in Southeast Central Illinois, and in that area I believe we saw Color too much. We were an all white community, and when black's especially moved into the area, they didn't stay long because they were not welcomed.
 
I was in my 20's before I had a friendship with someone of color, and it did start out ackward, because I didn't know what I could or should say and what I couldn't or shouldn't, but finally curiosity got the best of me, and as a result, I learned a great deal about a culture that was totally different from mine in some ways, and amazingly similar in others.
 
In the United States, there is one thing that most of us have forgotten, and if we would bring it to rememberance perhaps we would all be more tolerant. Unless we are of American Indian descent, we are all immigrants, from different countries, cultures, and with unique beliefs.
 
In our history, we have exercised hatred toward more than just Black Americans. There was a time when we hated the Germans, even though many of us were of German descent. We have hated the American Indians, even though they were here first. We have hated the Japanese, and it goes on an on.
 
I guess what I'm trying to say, and not very well, is that the true issue in this country is hatred, not racism. If we could to love all humanity, then color would not be an issue.
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» left by Yangki Christine Akiteng 2 years 258 days ago.
103 fans.
Nila, I like your humility.  Your comment though says you are VERY smart to join any conversation.  I particularly like what you said about curiosity getting the best of you and as a result, you learning a great deal about a culture that was totally different from yours in some ways, and amazingly similar in others. I believe that if many people were more curious about others different from them, the fear that drives racism would be weakened when we realize that underneath cultural differences, we all want the same basics -- respect, fairness, be treated with dignity and be given the same opportunities.  Instead most of us tend to gravitate towards those who are like us.  Others try to force their cultures and ways -- which they think are superior -- on to people of another culture.
 
true issue in this country is hatred, not racism.
 
I don’t know much about the United States -- which is only a very small part of the world -- but in the  REAL world these two go hand in hand. 
 
Racism = race-based prejudice, violence, discrimination, or oppression,
Hatred = intense feelings of dislike including hatred of other people, or even entire groups of people
 
There are -- all over the world -- whole groups of people who are intensely disliked just because of their race or colour and not for anything they have personally done or not done.  And yes, if we could love all humanity, then colour would not be an issue.  This sounds really good. But this is what we all say day in and day out.  There are still people  who  will not be hired because of their race, be served in a restaurant because of their colour, not be able to get an apartment because of their race, who’ll be given a prison sentence that does not befit the crime because of their race etc. 
 
Unlike popular belief, people who feel oppressed because of their race, are not looking to be” liked” (some of us can’t even keep up with those who like us), most people are looking to be treated fairly, without racial-bias or discrimination, and to be allowed to live with dignity and respect like everybody else. Personally, it’d be nice to be accepted than tolerated (endured, put up with), but if tolerance is all I can get from someone, then I’ll take tolerance over being ignored as if I am invisible.  Ignoring someone is dehumanizing - it’s like saying you are not worth the time.  Asking for a little recognition of one's humanity is not a bad thing, or is it…:-)
 
Thank you for joining the discussion, and for being curious enough… :-)
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» left by Sally Lehrman
2 years 178 days ago.
2 fans.
Thanks for this thoughtful article. As for the origin of racism, it might make more sense to ask about the origin of "race" -- not skin color, but the social construct that puts people in a hierarchy based on skin color. I just finished Audrey Smedley's book on the origin of race in North America. It's an excellent work, and traces the ideology of race to British ideas brought to the colonies. Another book, "We are all Moors," by Anouar Majid, traces race and racism back to Spain and its efforts to create a "pure" culture by way of expulsion of Jews and then Muslims. Both are worth a read.
 
I also highly recommend the Implicit Association Test. It's an important reminder of the "bugs" planted in our mind by popular culture and other influences.
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